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    uganda
    uganda  7 United Kingdom
    6 May 2013 - 11:11 AM

    http://timothyaikman.wix.com/photo2

    Any thoughts/comments would be appreciated...

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    6 May 2013 - 11:11 AM

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    scottishphototours

    - fix the spelling mistake (Sciences) on the Bio page and rewrite it - the grammar is very poor.
    - Remove the obvious Edinburgh views and festival type pics and the Royals pics too - neither seem relevant to me.
    - The pic of Salmond is terrible, I'd take that out too.
    - The UK section is particularly strong - good content (with changes above)

    Also - use capital letters on India and Uganda too??

    uganda
    uganda  7 United Kingdom
    6 May 2013 - 12:43 PM

    Thanks - the capital letters change according to which page you're on.

    But I'll make the changes now - they should be visible in a few minutes....

    scottishphototours

    How about this grammar?...


    Primarily pursuing documentary portrait photography with a view to covering social issues, my photography will enable business, media and NGO’s to develop articles, reports and any other publications which will require images for the purposes of public relations, social responsibility and advertising.


    And then...

    Timothy Aikman is from Edinburgh, was educated at the Edinburgh Academy and graduated from Stevenson College in 2003 with a Licentiateship of the British Institute of Professional Photography. He has since graduated from the Open University with a BA Hons. which incorporates his photography and interest in Social Sciences and International Studies.

    Predominantly interested in the third world and its peoples, Timothy has combined his work as a documentary photographer with that of an international aid worker. Some of the issues that affect him, and that are reflected in his work, are poverty and AIDS in Africa. Timothy’s work focuses on how individuals cope with such problems and his subjects are active participants in his portraits.

    Based in Edinburgh, Timothy is available for editorial and documentary work.

    Subtle but possibly better!

    Also, what's on page 4?? - comes up blank for me.

    Last Modified By scottishphototours at 6 May 2013 - 1:41 PM
    peterjones
    peterjones e2 Member 123913 forum postspeterjones vcard United Kingdom1 Constructive Critique Points
    6 May 2013 - 1:48 PM

    I would also suggest a good dictionary and Roger's Thesaurus ..........Wink

    Peter.

    uganda
    uganda  7 United Kingdom
    6 May 2013 - 2:03 PM

    Thanks - I was just looking at the writing...

    Please ignore page four for the time being - I may just delete that page, or use it for "current and/or future work".

    But, first things first - I'll try to get the current pages remedied first!

    uganda
    uganda  7 United Kingdom
    6 May 2013 - 3:19 PM

    Current incarnation of possible website is available at the above link....

    scottishphototours

    Looks good to me...you're hired!

    ade_mcfade
    ade_mcfade e2 Member 1014794 forum postsade_mcfade vcard England216 Constructive Critique Points
    6 May 2013 - 6:32 PM

    brighter menu items... can't read dark grey against black

    FrogTastic
    15 Jul 2013 - 10:17 AM

    Seems to be a lot of open space at the bottom

    Simon_Marlow
    Simon_Marlow e2 Member 10119 forum postsSimon_Marlow vcard United Kingdom
    15 Jul 2013 - 1:30 PM

    Sorry, but when viewing the UK portfolio shots, you could be forgiven for thinking you're on a 'Do you recognise this person' from the riots website.

    I would try to diversify the subjects a bit.

    KevinEllison
    KevinEllison e2 Member 72504 forum postsKevinEllison vcard England
    15 Jul 2013 - 4:20 PM

    Projects - Explore by light - Uganda ".....audience to relate....." not too relate

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