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sugarbird
sugarbird  10223 forum posts South Africa
8 Aug 2008 - 4:09 AM

http://www.dayswithmyfather.com/

I found this incredible....my respect.link

Last Modified By sugarbird at 8 Aug 2008 - 4:10 AM
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8 Aug 2008 - 4:09 AM

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NevP
NevP  9853 forum posts Canada13 Constructive Critique Points
8 Aug 2008 - 4:58 AM

My respect too. It's rare to find this honesty so beautifully and eloquently expressed.

mark2uk
mark2uk  8739 forum posts England8 Constructive Critique Points
8 Aug 2008 - 7:11 AM

A beautiful piece of work.
Very moving.

kitsch
kitsch  8439 forum posts United Kingdom4 Constructive Critique Points
8 Aug 2008 - 7:30 AM

very moving & eloquent, and wonderful photography too...

randomrubble
8 Aug 2008 - 7:48 AM

Really good work.

Geraint
Geraint  8715 forum posts Wales34 Constructive Critique Points
8 Aug 2008 - 7:51 AM

Incredibly moving. Thanks for sharing the link Jill.
Geraint

answersonapostcard
answersonapostcard Site Moderator 1012609 forum postsanswersonapostcard vcard United Kingdom15 Constructive Critique Points
8 Aug 2008 - 8:11 AM

Beautiful, and quite moving... thanks Jill.

redjoker
redjoker  6981 forum posts England4 Constructive Critique Points
8 Aug 2008 - 9:31 AM

wow very good, and very moving, thanks for the link

Stewy
Stewy e2 Member 7101 forum postsStewy vcard England2 Constructive Critique Points
8 Aug 2008 - 11:51 AM

Incredibly moving and beautifully photographed.

csurry
csurry  129230 forum posts92 Constructive Critique Points
8 Aug 2008 - 11:59 AM

Good photography and simple text that said everything that needed saying.

Each image was good enough to stand on its own merits even without text, which is of course the main test/criteria for a strong photo essay.

Thanks for finding and sharing.

jimthistle73
8 Aug 2008 - 12:07 PM

Cheers for the link - hugely enjoyed that. Everyone with a spare moment should check it out.

Technically, it hangs together incredibly well. Continuity is the key word - the tones are similar throughout and the tiny DOF leads the eye to the pertinent detail.

strawman
strawman  1022010 forum posts United Kingdom16 Constructive Critique Points
8 Aug 2008 - 12:18 PM

Well worth a view it captures a lot.

But it does so sound like Altzheimers, the behavours fit in so much with how my grandfather was. I remember he once read the same newspaper article over 10 times, each time expressing shock at the headlines, then telling a tale of how he boxed as a youth, with humour and intesity,. Then he would stop and stair into space, the light fade from his eyes and he would slow pick up the paper, read the headline...

Those photographs capture the different phases so well, just look at his father face..........

Last Modified By strawman at 8 Aug 2008 - 12:26 PM
Coleslaw
Coleslaw e2 Member 913403 forum postsColeslaw vcard Wales28 Constructive Critique Points
8 Aug 2008 - 12:23 PM

Very touching....

John_Frid
John_Frid  8514 forum posts United Kingdom56 Constructive Critique Points
8 Aug 2008 - 12:42 PM

An incredibly touching essay - so wonderfully and sensitively produced.

Graywolf
Graywolf  7964 forum posts United Kingdom
8 Aug 2008 - 10:20 PM

Very very moving.

It touched me in very many ways.

No one who has not dealt with dementia can really understand the the depths and heights it can drive you down and up to.

The Christmas before my dad, died 5 1/2 years ago, he was in hospital with cancer of the everything. After the three remaining members of my family had left I was on my own with my mum, who had already fairly advanced dementia, for the week until new year. I cannot remember how many times I must have explained to her where dad was and what was the matter with him.

She is not always an easy person to be with and dementai seems to show the real deep down person, but with the inhibitions stripped away, and the lowest point at that time for me was being on my knees in the dining room in tears of despair and frustration at the way in which she seemed to deliberately baulk me at every turn. The most important lesson I learned at that time was, 'probably best to do nothing' because in the end things sort themselves out.

by comparison..

Probably one of the funniest incidents was driving her back from her sister's in Somerset the next Christmas. She has a stoma bag, and this does not combine well with dementia and poor eyesight.

We stopped at services on the M5 coming north ( I won't tell you which one it was) as we needed to eat, which we did. She then decided she needed to go to the loo. She returned quite quickly to announce that her bag had 'burst'.

OK I can deal with this. Into the car, fossick about and find some fresh ones. oh But wait.. they need to be cut to the right size. No problem, up to the till and borrow a pair of scissors. By this time she has found a pre -cut bag in her handbag, so I pack her off back to the ladies to do the business.

about 10 minutes later she returns carrying

wait for it........

the old stoma bag wrapped in her knickers.

I take her by the elbow and hustle her to the door.

'Just put it all in the bin there mum' I said pointing to the bin outside the main door.

She started to argue but by that stage I wasn't having any of that.


An hour and a half later we called at another service station for her to have a wee.

As we were leaving the building she tucked her arm in mine and whispered.

'Whatever you do don't have a crash'

I looked at her and said,

"what are you talking about mother?"

'I seem to have forgotten to put any knickers on this morning'.

I nearly pissed myself laughing, and it ended up with her helping me to the car.

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