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Shall I stay or shall I go

Attention!

This topic is locked.

Reason : question answered


Fishnet 10 5.0k 5 United Kingdom
27 Oct 2006 8:05PM
On another forum I frequent a lot one member took an intense dislike to me, and called me all sorts of names and hurled general abuse she was going right off the rails and I asked if she'd been sniffing her kids felt tip pens and she went nuts, complained to the head honchos about my abuse and she consequently got banned. Every now and again someone says something hurtful and insulting and I just let it run off my back.
I have taken long breaks from there before rather than leaving altogether because it's so easy to get caught up in it all and at the end of the day it's not real life and I have faaaaar more serious and upsetting things going on in my life right now than to get wound up by some dim wit sitting at their lap top in stained tracksuit bottoms and unwashed hair wanting to get their kicks by insulting me online.

Just take a break when it gets to you, why should you stop doing something you enjoy because of a bully ?

P.S. I didn't come on here for a while (not for any reason other than new baby and all that) and I don't think anyone missed me lol

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Pete e2
13 18.7k 96 England
27 Oct 2006 8:10PM
Sadly Paul, I think you made the mistake of saying once or twice that you went to school with me. A few narrow-minded people will have thought that because of this I would favour your pics and give ECs. I've heard this mentioned, about you, and others. I get accused of a lot of things, but any biased because I know someone (at what ever level) is not in my nature. Some of your photographs are outstanding.

What we are talking about here is jealousy and from just a few people who can influence a few more. It's not a big problem, but it appears big because it's seen in forums. When we do anything about it it's seen as protecting. It's quite frankly, pathetic! But at the end of the day it is just a few who rock the boat.

My view, (and I'm agreeing with CB) is that you probably won't create a huge impact by going, because it is now a huge site with many newcomers arriving daily. To be totally honest even if I left, it wouldn't take long for me to be forgotten.

But why let a few people get you down? Why spoil the enjoyment? There are times when I regret allowing the level of free speech in the forums (that we supposedly quash), because no matter how little negativity appears it creates waves of panic, threat, stupidity, anger(add as many other emotions as you like). The majority of members enjoy the site, some will get tainted by the views of others, some naturally get bored and some fall out.

I've seen several times in the forums people winding you up about spelling. A quick run over with a spell check would resolve some of that. But you have, on a few occasions risen to the bate and abuse has been hurled too and fro. You've naturally said some harmful (and potentially libelous) things back. Ignore them is my advice and enjoy those who respect your opinions. And I imagine there are many who look up to you.

I'll end with the point that if anyone on this site is getting private messages that are threatening or libelous and you suspect it's come from someone on here, just forward them to us and we'll do anything we can to help.

And finally I'd like you to stay, like many would.

And finally, finally, if anyone has these sort of feelings please don't post in the forums it creates so much unnecessary work for the mods and I! And also sets you up for more abuse.
User_Removed 10 17.9k 8 Norway
27 Oct 2006 8:13PM

Quote:Whould I be missed if I went from here??


Undoubtedly by those who really know and value your friendship.



Seems I'm right Paul - along with so many others.

You are too highly valued and loved here to have a small minority dictate your life to you.

Smile
andytvcams 12 10.4k United Kingdom
27 Oct 2006 8:14PM

Quote:Only you can decide


Its your call Paul,

But i cannot help thinking that by starting this thread reminds me of the guy wanting to jump off the bridge then phoning the Samaritans to ask if its OK!!
Sus 10 3.2k 9 England
27 Oct 2006 8:14PM
The point you make about the site being entertainment is a good one. In real life, it is easier to avoid socialising with particular people, even if you have to work or socialise in a group together. In the internet, we expose ourselves to everyone indiscriminantly, even the weirdos we'd manage to avoid in real life.

(and for some this appears to be more true than for others! I think I'm beginning to remember that photo now...!)
ZenTog 12 7.9k 1 England
27 Oct 2006 8:17PM
thanks for all the kind thoughts from people on here, See CB there are member who do care.

For the detractors a big rasberry!!!

its probally only my SAD (seasonal hatred of winter months) disoder coming around , and Andy you probally would like to see the back of Me!!!
Pete e2
13 18.7k 96 England
27 Oct 2006 8:19PM

Quote:and Andy you probably would like to see the back of Me!!!


FFS Paul read my post, don't rise to the bait!!!!
ZenTog 12 7.9k 1 England
27 Oct 2006 8:20PM
Sorry bossman I will not raise to the Bait !!!!! I will chant that mantra for the next week

plus I have decided to only enter in to threads that are fluff and light hearted ,no more nikon and canon fights, no more slagging of members for dodgy pictures, no more no more
shaks 12 561 1 Tokelau
27 Oct 2006 8:27PM
Bugger, why can't I get this kind of agro?

Oh yeah, please stick around.
andytvcams 12 10.4k United Kingdom
27 Oct 2006 8:27PM

Quote:and Andy you probally would like to see the back of Me!!!


Did i say that!!

FFS

Now i understand...
MDR_Photo 10 872 England
27 Oct 2006 8:27PM
Paul,

Please do not leave.

You are an inspiration to me and so many others. Your surf photos are top quality!

But more than that on a personal note you gave me the opportunity to work for you without having any experience or even much knowledge. You welcomed me and treated me like part of the family.

And you know how me first met/spoke? Yes you remember on EPZ!!!

Don't leave is the simple answer, take a break like I have recently but no need to clear out and go.

Michael
Carabosse e2
11 39.7k 269 England
27 Oct 2006 8:28PM

Quote:See CB there are member who do care


Did I say there weren't?

However, Pete has agreed with me that the departure of anybody is unlikely to create much of an impact. Even himself..... he says!! :-O

That's the actual honest answer to your question Paul - if that's what you want.


{Memo to self: must remember I'm not in the Critique Gallery}

;-D
NevP 9 853 13 Canada
27 Oct 2006 8:28PM
The site content would be poorer if you went. Smile
ZenTog 12 7.9k 1 England
27 Oct 2006 8:31PM
yeah mike you were one of the nicest people I have met in the physical from ephotozine, you worked hard for me with no complaints, I only wish you lived in cornwall you would have a lot of jobs Mike, as long as i could keep you away from the bloddy cricket that is!!!

Detractors I am not listening listening listening, god I need some sunshine and surf !!!!!
lgc 10 62 England
27 Oct 2006 8:33PM
ahhh! calmed down a bit now Paul, listened to The Green Guide to Life on Radio 2 playback, did the trick! highly recommend it. Hope now you have you answer and that you will be staying.
will be waiting for your next upload! Ate logo!