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Shall I stay or shall I go

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Reason: question answered
Fishnet
Fishnet  104976 forum posts United Kingdom5 Constructive Critique Points
27 Oct 2006 - 8:05 PM

On another forum I frequent a lot one member took an intense dislike to me, and called me all sorts of names and hurled general abuse she was going right off the rails and I asked if she'd been sniffing her kids felt tip pens and she went nuts, complained to the head honchos about my abuse and she consequently got banned. Every now and again someone says something hurtful and insulting and I just let it run off my back.
I have taken long breaks from there before rather than leaving altogether because it's so easy to get caught up in it all and at the end of the day it's not real life and I have faaaaar more serious and upsetting things going on in my life right now than to get wound up by some dim wit sitting at their lap top in stained tracksuit bottoms and unwashed hair wanting to get their kicks by insulting me online.

Just take a break when it gets to you, why should you stop doing something you enjoy because of a bully ?

P.S. I didn't come on here for a while (not for any reason other than new baby and all that) and I don't think anyone missed me lol

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27 Oct 2006 - 8:05 PM

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Pete
Pete Site Moderator 1318456 forum postsPete vcard ePz Advertiser England96 Constructive Critique Points
27 Oct 2006 - 8:10 PM

Sadly Paul, I think you made the mistake of saying once or twice that you went to school with me. A few narrow-minded people will have thought that because of this I would favour your pics and give ECs. I've heard this mentioned, about you, and others. I get accused of a lot of things, but any biased because I know someone (at what ever level) is not in my nature. Some of your photographs are outstanding.

What we are talking about here is jealousy and from just a few people who can influence a few more. It's not a big problem, but it appears big because it's seen in forums. When we do anything about it it's seen as protecting. It's quite frankly, pathetic! But at the end of the day it is just a few who rock the boat.

My view, (and I'm agreeing with CB) is that you probably won't create a huge impact by going, because it is now a huge site with many newcomers arriving daily. To be totally honest even if I left, it wouldn't take long for me to be forgotten.

But why let a few people get you down? Why spoil the enjoyment? There are times when I regret allowing the level of free speech in the forums (that we supposedly quash), because no matter how little negativity appears it creates waves of panic, threat, stupidity, anger(add as many other emotions as you like). The majority of members enjoy the site, some will get tainted by the views of others, some naturally get bored and some fall out.

I've seen several times in the forums people winding you up about spelling. A quick run over with a spell check would resolve some of that. But you have, on a few occasions risen to the bate and abuse has been hurled too and fro. You've naturally said some harmful (and potentially libelous) things back. Ignore them is my advice and enjoy those who respect your opinions. And I imagine there are many who look up to you.

I'll end with the point that if anyone on this site is getting private messages that are threatening or libelous and you suspect it's come from someone on here, just forward them to us and we'll do anything we can to help.

And finally I'd like you to stay, like many would.

And finally, finally, if anyone has these sort of feelings please don't post in the forums it creates so much unnecessary work for the mods and I! And also sets you up for more abuse.

Helpful Post! This post was flagged as helpful
User_Removed
27 Oct 2006 - 8:13 PM


Quote: Whould I be missed if I went from here??


Undoubtedly by those who really know and value your friendship.

Seems I'm right Paul - along with so many others.

You are too highly valued and loved here to have a small minority dictate your life to you.

Smile

andytvcams
andytvcams  1210396 forum posts United Kingdom
27 Oct 2006 - 8:14 PM


Quote: Only you can decide

Its your call Paul,

But i cannot help thinking that by starting this thread reminds me of the guy wanting to jump off the bridge then phoning the Samaritans to ask if its OK!!

Sus
Sus  103183 forum posts England9 Constructive Critique Points
27 Oct 2006 - 8:14 PM

The point you make about the site being entertainment is a good one. In real life, it is easier to avoid socialising with particular people, even if you have to work or socialise in a group together. In the internet, we expose ourselves to everyone indiscriminantly, even the weirdos we'd manage to avoid in real life.

(and for some this appears to be more true than for others! I think I'm beginning to remember that photo now...!)

ZenTog
ZenTog  127875 forum posts England1 Constructive Critique Points
27 Oct 2006 - 8:17 PM

thanks for all the kind thoughts from people on here, See CB there are member who do care.

For the detractors a big rasberry!!!

its probally only my SAD (seasonal hatred of winter months) disoder coming around , and Andy you probally would like to see the back of Me!!!

Pete
Pete Site Moderator 1318456 forum postsPete vcard ePz Advertiser England96 Constructive Critique Points
27 Oct 2006 - 8:19 PM


Quote: and Andy you probably would like to see the back of Me!!!

FFS Paul read my post, don't rise to the bait!!!!

ZenTog
ZenTog  127875 forum posts England1 Constructive Critique Points
27 Oct 2006 - 8:20 PM

Sorry bossman I will not raise to the Bait !!!!! I will chant that mantra for the next week

plus I have decided to only enter in to threads that are fluff and light hearted ,no more nikon and canon fights, no more slagging of members for dodgy pictures, no more no more

shaks
shaks  12561 forum posts Tokelau1 Constructive Critique Points
27 Oct 2006 - 8:27 PM

Bugger, why can't I get this kind of agro?

Oh yeah, please stick around.

andytvcams
andytvcams  1210396 forum posts United Kingdom
27 Oct 2006 - 8:27 PM


Quote: and Andy you probally would like to see the back of Me!!!

Did i say that!!

FFS

Now i understand...

MDR_Photo
MDR_Photo  9872 forum posts England
27 Oct 2006 - 8:27 PM

Paul,

Please do not leave.

You are an inspiration to me and so many others. Your surf photos are top quality!

But more than that on a personal note you gave me the opportunity to work for you without having any experience or even much knowledge. You welcomed me and treated me like part of the family.

And you know how me first met/spoke? Yes you remember on EPZ!!!

Don't leave is the simple answer, take a break like I have recently but no need to clear out and go.

Michael

Carabosse
Carabosse e2 Member 1139544 forum postsCarabosse vcard England269 Constructive Critique Points
27 Oct 2006 - 8:28 PM


Quote: See CB there are member who do care

Did I say there weren't?

However, Pete has agreed with me that the departure of anybody is unlikely to create much of an impact. Even himself..... he says!! :-O

That's the actual honest answer to your question Paul - if that's what you want.


{Memo to self: must remember I'm not in the Critique Gallery}

;-D

NevP
NevP  9853 forum posts Canada13 Constructive Critique Points
27 Oct 2006 - 8:28 PM

The site content would be poorer if you went. Smile

ZenTog
ZenTog  127875 forum posts England1 Constructive Critique Points
27 Oct 2006 - 8:31 PM

yeah mike you were one of the nicest people I have met in the physical from ephotozine, you worked hard for me with no complaints, I only wish you lived in cornwall you would have a lot of jobs Mike, as long as i could keep you away from the bloddy cricket that is!!!

Detractors I am not listening listening listening, god I need some sunshine and surf !!!!!

lgc
lgc  1062 forum posts England
27 Oct 2006 - 8:33 PM

ahhh! calmed down a bit now Paul, listened to The Green Guide to Life on Radio 2 playback, did the trick! highly recommend it. Hope now you have you answer and that you will be staying.
will be waiting for your next upload! Ate logo!

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