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I've had another go playing around with L/R to increase contrast etc.

Brand:Pentax
Camera:Pentax K-5 Check out PENTAXPORTAL!
Recording media:JPEG (digital)
Date Taken:28 Jul 2011 - 4:37 PM
Focal Length:88mm
Aperture:f/5.6
Shutter Speed:1/125sec
Exposure Comp:0.0
ISO:200
Exposure Mode:Program AE
Metering Mode:Multi-segment
Flash:Off, Did not fire
Title:Hi Grandad
Username:purplehaze purplehaze
Uploaded:7 Sep 2011 - 9:55 PM
Tags:Portraits / people
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Comments

This photo is here for critique. Please only comment constructively and with suggestions on how to improve it.
banehawi
banehawi Critique Team 10865 forum postsbanehawi vcard Canada2860 Constructive Critique Points
8 Sep 2011 - 12:54 AMConstructive Critique!This comment was flagged as constructive critique! 

A great pose. She seems to suit b&w very well. I love this expression, - so far away!


Its underexposed quite a bit, and this may well be again due to very bright light behind her. Try some shots with the flash forced up. so it provides some fill in light, and will also give you some nice catch lights in her eyes.

Looking at composition, you can crop space top and bottom to place her eyes on a third, - and so much of a portrait is simply about the eyes.


Ive loaded mods with the suggested crop, - and have three variants, - second two using different methods to soften slightly, with mod3 tilted a little. In all, Ive used the shadow tool on CS4 to lift the detail in her eyes, and used a soft 2 pixel white brush to put some catchlights in her eyes.


I hope this is helpful


Regards


W

Last Modified By banehawi at 8 Sep 2011 - 12:55 AM

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purplehaze
8 Sep 2011 - 1:49 AM

Thanks banehawi! I think I messed the exposure up in l/r, my reflection was in Sadie's eyes and I was trying to reduce it. I've no skill with selective editing.
It is actually a small crop as her mum was holding her, and I removed her. Sadie is a fantastic model, she rarely smiles which makes for a unique picture!
I've really learnt something here, I wouldn't have considered moving the eyes on the third because of cropping her head but I can see it really works, I love the 3rd tilted crop.
I've also learnt all photographers are generally nocturnal which suits me fine!
Thanks for your valuable time, much appreciated.
Andy H.

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paulbroad
paulbroad  781 forum posts United Kingdom851 Constructive Critique Points
8 Sep 2011 - 7:57 AM

Hello again,

Yes, you have a fantastic model and your content, composition etc. is first class. You are still lacking that punch though, and it is probably due to under exposure with some loss in conversion. Will try a mod.

Paul

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purplehaze
8 Sep 2011 - 8:29 PM

Thanks Paul, I feel a bit of a pest! I noticed the image looked darker on the site when I loaded it from l/r I thought this was my total inexpierience converting from colour. As I said to Willie (above) I did play around to try and reduce my reflection in Sadie's eye's and try to make her shoulder stand away from the background if you know what I mean.
From what you said I opened your mod on my desktop and couldn't see a great deal of difference, however when I opened your mod on my iPad your mod is lighter and punchier, it looks amazing! Putting your mod on my desktop with my iPad at it's side it looks like a different image! Don't know where that leaves me, Willie suggested using f/fox or safari may help, maybe this is the issue?
I've only had a camera for 6 months and this is only site where I am learning, which is down to everybody here! I need to get some grip on editing and I'm reading the tutorials! At the weekend I'll load the colour original, if you could find time to open it it would be interesting to see if that comes across underexposed, I promise I won't touch it first! Lol
Once again Paul thanks for all your help. Much appreciated
Andy Hayes

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purplehaze
8 Sep 2011 - 10:37 PM

Paul, I've uploaded a colour version, unfortuantly I think I picked the wrong image (the camera was on burst mode, so it was a split second before!)
Be interesting to see what this looks like on your monitor
Thanks
Andy H.

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