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Pavement of Light

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This photo was taken before i had purchased a tripod so the camera was on the kerb with a shutter speed of 25 seconds at 8pm

Camera:Nikon D3100 Check out Nikon Nation!
Lens:18-55mm f/3.5-5.6 G VR
Recording media:RAW (digital)
Date Taken:10 Nov 2013 - 9:00 PM
Focal Length:25mm
Lens Max Aperture:f/8
Aperture:f/8
Shutter Speed:25sec
ISO:100
Exposure Mode:manual
Title:Pavement of Light
Username:mrstefbrown mrstefbrown
Uploaded:20 Nov 2013 - 9:10 AM
Tags:Close-up / macro, Flash / lighting, General, Landscape / travel, Sports / action
VS Mode Rating 96 (40% won)
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Has Modifications Modifications Welcome (Upload a Modification)
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Comments

This photo is here for critique. Please only comment constructively and with suggestions on how to improve it.
mrswoolybill
mrswoolybill Critique Team 7435 forum postsmrswoolybill vcard United Kingdom1024 Constructive Critique Points
20 Nov 2013 - 4:46 PM

It's an original idea, and remarkably good quality for 25 seconds and a free-standing camera! The main problem for me is the large foreground area that is out of focus. The focus is where it should be, there's just too much soft foreground. That's the bit nearest to us, we need to feel that we could reach out and touch it, so it needs to be hard, tactile.

The simplest improvement here I think would be a letterbox crop. I also want to rotate slightly, to get the verticals nearest to the centre of the frame true. I'll try a quick Mod.
Moira

Last Modified By mrswoolybill at 20 Nov 2013 - 4:49 PM

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chase
chase Critique Team 91118 forum postschase vcard England240 Constructive Critique Points
20 Nov 2013 - 6:12 PM

I agree with Moira,far too much fg going on with no interest to hold the attention of the viewer.Perhaps you could have looked for something to either put in the fg or tried a different viewpoint to contain something static...which would give us the feeling of speed/movement.
You did well to keep the camera steady without a tripod,well done !

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paulbroad
paulbroad  781 forum posts United Kingdom853 Constructive Critique Points
20 Nov 2013 - 8:28 PM

I think there is the basis of a good image there using what you have as a foil to a subject, bottom left third. An old boot or something. There is no composition in this as presented and you must do something with the foreground.

Paul

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pamelajean
pamelajean Critique Team 8769 forum postspamelajean vcard United Kingdom1598 Constructive Critique Points
20 Nov 2013 - 8:36 PM

Very nicely done, Stef.
I like Moira's modification.

This is more abstract than your previous image.
If I try to view it as anything other than abstract in style, I'd like to see a bit more context, to see more of the scene behind the traffic trails, but your very low point of view is preventing this.
Having said that, I like the idea, the strong colours and strong lines.

In my first modification I was seeking to achieve a square crop that eliminated some of the foreground and concentrated on the area that had some background in it. I added canvas to the top, and think I should have darkened the sky, as I did in my second modification. Here I was seeking to straighten the bottom golden line of the road and to spread out the patterns along the vertical for extra balance.

Pamela.

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mrstefbrown
21 Nov 2013 - 9:01 AM

Thank you for all your comments, Moira and Pamela, are you using photoshop for your modifications? i need to buy that when i can afford it, all ive got at present is Apples Aperture and im still learning to use that. This was meant to be an abstract kind of picture, so when you first look you dont really know what it is!! as i said i didnt have a tripod so was just having a play about!! Paul - i like your idea about the boot or soemthing, ill dewfinitly bear that in mind in the future. Today im going to put a pic up i took yesterday while out driving through the Malvern hills. Please critique away guys, all your help is muchly appreciated.

Stef

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pamelajean
pamelajean Critique Team 8769 forum postspamelajean vcard United Kingdom1598 Constructive Critique Points
21 Nov 2013 - 8:39 PM

Hello again, Stef.
I noticed that people have told you what editing software they have, on your next picture.
I use Corel PaintshopPro, which I find very user friendly, and it does everything that I need. I am so used to it now that I would be loathe to change to Photoshop. PaintshopPro is also cheaper.
You can download a trial version here.
If you simply google for something like Editing Software Free Trials, I'm sure you will get some good sites to visit.
There are also several free editing programmes on the web, which you can google for by just doing a search for Free Photographic Editing Programmes:-
Pixlr-o-matic, Pixlr Photo Editor, Photoshop Express, FotoFlexer, Picnik, Lunapic, Phixr, Free online photo editor, Pho.to online editor, iZap, Picasa, GIMP (a popular one).

Pamela.

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