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urban cages

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Modern life is often a cage without walls. They exist, but we don' see them. Daily routine is the worst...

Recording media:JPEG (digital)
Title:urban cages
Username:Mariosp Mariosp
Uploaded:28 Mar 2014 - 9:15 AM
Tags:Portraits / people, Street photography, Subway
VS Mode Rating 99 (0% won)
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Has Modifications Modifications Welcome (Upload a Modification)
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Comments

This photo is here for critique. Please only comment constructively and with suggestions on how to improve it.
TanyaH
TanyaH e2 Member 11498 forum postsTanyaH vcard United Kingdom40 Constructive Critique Points
28 Mar 2014 - 11:10 AMConstructive Critique!This comment was flagged as constructive critique! 

Hello Mario - I really like this image, and what you're trying to portray with it. I've uploaded a mod where I've adjusted the horizonals and verticals a touch, and cropped to both remove the scan bit at the bottom (which I think detracts the eye from the rest of the image) and to move the man himself over slightly to the left so that sits on a 'third' line (the composition 'rule of thirds'). The only problem with removing the scan bit is that it also removes the dark bar at the bottom, which I actually quite like as I think it adds a feeling of weight to the image. (Mind you, I didn't want to do any cloning of those bars, so the mod I've done is a bit of a quick one).

I haven't played with the tonal range of the image at all, as I like how you've done it here. It really does give a feeling of the daily monotonous grind, behind the walls and cages we all have to exist in sometimes.

Best wishes
Tanya

Last Modified By TanyaH at 28 Mar 2014 - 11:10 AM

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dudler
dudler Critique Team 1196 forum postsdudler vcard England291 Constructive Critique Points
28 Mar 2014 - 11:29 AM

I think Tanya's covered most of what I could possibly say, and her mod makes the very most of the shot.

I can see that you've been a member of EPZ for some time, but this seems to be yoru first upload to the Critique Gallery - welcome!

While it doesn't affect this particular picture very much, it's generally helpful to the Critique Team if you can upload EXIF data in full. This helps in tracing problems, espeically if you have posed a specific question for us to deal with, so please add it to future uploads.

You can do this by clicking on the Options button below your picture, then on Edit photo, then at Edit photo information click on the Exif tab. Complete the boxes, then click on Save.

I'm sure you know where to find that information but for reference, open the picture on your hard drive, right click on it, click on Properties, and then Details.

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Mariosp
Mariosp  3 Portugal
28 Mar 2014 - 11:31 AM

Tanya, thank you very much for the suggestions and critique. This is my first photo here and I'm discovering a lot around.
The first problem with this photo was the timing of shoot: a fraction earlier and the man would be right on place. The lines... a tripod would have been the solution, this one was hand helded.

Thank you very much Grin

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Mariosp
Mariosp  3 Portugal
28 Mar 2014 - 11:38 AM

Dudler, thanks for your advice. The EXIF is automaticaly disabled when I save the photos on my photo editor, but it can be changed, I'll pay attention to that. I became member of ePz to learn and for the newsletter. I'll keep that in mind Grin

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paulbroad
paulbroad  781 forum posts United Kingdom850 Constructive Critique Points
28 Mar 2014 - 3:42 PM

I rather like this in general. Strong and simple. I think I would crop bottom and left a bit to move the figure nearer the bottom left.

What is that scan thing. Is it supposed to be there? Definately must go. A total eye puller.

Paul

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pamelajean
pamelajean Critique Team 8759 forum postspamelajean vcard United Kingdom1591 Constructive Critique Points
28 Mar 2014 - 8:55 PM

Hello, Mario, and welcome to the Critique Gallery.

As well as your Exif Data/camera settings, it's useful if you can provide us with a description that includes things like what inspired you to take this photo, what you were hoping to achieve, and if there are any particular areas on which you would like critique.
We try to give advice that will help people to improve their photography both the taking and the editing of images.
So remember that the more information you give us as regards your photographic aims and intentions, the better. The bit of information you gave in your above comment about the "fraction of a second" is very useful.

This image is very well seen and taken, the isolation of the pedestrian, the downward tilt of his head, the slow short stride, all contributing to your story about urban cages and the slog of daily routine. There is a touch of movement blur in one of his feet, which is good, an indication that he is walking, however slowly.
I particularly like the shapes and different tones within the background. They point towards your walker, directing the viewer's eye to him. The image's simplicity is its strength. Without the bars, it would not contain the same message.

I agree with the comment about the positioning of your walker. However, you have placed him nicely against the largest area of plain wall, so that's good, but he's just a little too central. I see from above that you did want him to be positioned further to the left, so at least you understand the principles of composition and tried to use them in this instance. He is walking towards the right and therefore it's generally a good idea to have more space on that side, for him to walk into, with less space behind him.

I am being very nit-picking when I say that it would be ideal to have the man's face inside one of the squares of the bars. As it is, his features are getting a little bit lost against a corner of one of those squares.

In my modification I have adjusted the lines, cropped to place the man on a thirds line, then cloned out the remainder of the logo. I also brightened the image and adjusted Levels.

Pamela.

Last Modified By pamelajean at 28 Mar 2014 - 8:57 PM

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pablophotographer

Now then!

I like the assymetry in your photo Mario, and I accept the boxes as they are and they appear in the picture.


Quote:
The first problem with this photo was the timing of shoot: a fraction earlier and the man would be right on place.

If the subject is on the wrong place in the frame, think immediately, move with him in the direction he/she/it walks Smile

welcome from me too
pablophotographer

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