Quite like this shot, but the low placement of your light source has caused your subjects' noses to cast unflattering shadows on their faces. I also find the light a little too harsh and directional, personal taste.

Try repeating this setup with the flash positioned a bit higher, and a reflector at the far side to soften the shadows (white sheet?).

Good effort for what was just an experiment.

Cloning it would clean the picture up, into more of a candid portrait; leaving it in leaves the shot more 'true to life' as you saw it - albeit you've already cloned some things out - I say try desaturating it, as the whole background is pretty grey. Leaving it in means it still carries its message/ suggestion, desaturating it may concentrate more attention onto the subject

I like this. Bit weird, but likeable for it. A teeny bit more attention to detail, if you'll be submitting shots like this for examination. Obviously your model has a ton of makeup on, but I can see flesh peeping through on the ears. On a personal note I'm not 100% convinced I like the lighting on the top of the head; the hair. Can't put my finger on it though.

For a previous upload I superimposed a sky, onto a globe. Try the spherize filter, I think I ended up doing it a couple of times to achieve the effect I was after. That might help you achieve the reflections/ catchlights you're after.