Your getting there, would like to see less on the fill light to get more dimension, Think about head angle straight on is not always the best - turn to main light more so your shooting on the shadow side (short lighting).

I see you have the dreaded crinkled grey colourama, grey is the worst for showing this up, either pull her along way from the background or get a new roll

Youve got a great model there so enjoy practising, get your lights more side on for more dramatic lighting - think lighting not illumination.

enjoy it