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REMEMBERING THE HMCS STAR

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The post processing work was in Camera-in-the-RAW applied auto the two tabs, and then opened in Adobe Photoshop Elements 7 where I cropped it to be 600 x 600 pixles, and then applied the UNSHARP MASK till I liked the Fixed using the results.

Camera:Pentax K10D Check out PENTAXPORTAL!
Lens:Pentax 18-55 mm
Recording media:RAW (digital)
Title:REMEMBERING THE HMCS STAR
Username:TimothyDMorton TimothyDMorton
Uploaded:16 Nov 2013 - 12:33 AM
Tags:11th DAY 11th MONTH AROUND 11th HOUR, Gore Park, Hamilton, HMCS STAR, Ontario, Photo journalism
VS Mode Rating 98 (16.67% won)
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Comments

This photo is here for critique. Please only comment constructively and with suggestions on how to improve it.
iancrowson
iancrowson e2 Member 4209 forum postsiancrowson vcard United Kingdom128 Constructive Critique Points
16 Nov 2013 - 10:51 AM

The flowers are well exposed and sharp with detail into the shadow areas.
A sympathetic and interesting picture.
My main concern is the composition. Did you take the photo to highlight the wreath or as a wider view. If this is a photo of the wreath then the background is distracting with a plant on one side and street area on the other. The camera was not level either. If it was a photo to show a bigger story then the background lacks interest.
I would say, keep an eye out for what's in the background. Here it distracts from the main subject.
Had the photo been commissioned by someone you would probably needed to move it. That might not have been an ok thing to do.

regards
Ian

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mrswoolybill
mrswoolybill Critique Team 7391 forum postsmrswoolybill vcard United Kingdom957 Constructive Critique Points
16 Nov 2013 - 1:09 PM

My thoughts on opening this were much as Ian's. It's a clear sharp image of the wreath, as a record, but it doesn't work as a picture. The tilt is disconcerting, it makes me feel that I and the wreath will topple over at any minute. And there's enough background to be irritating without adding anything. The crop is way too tight.

If you get a chance to retake this:

Stoop down lower, to the level of the wreath. Apart from anything else that will give you a better angle on the lettering.

Make sure that you have the camera level, and check straightness when you process the image, in order to do any fine-tuning there.

You cannot avoid street background so make it a part of the image. Your Exif isn't showing up, but on another occasion I would suggest full width, 18mm or not much longer; aperture priority and lowest F number available. Place the wreath on the left of the frame and focus there, which will give you a soft background with street interest on the right. That's today's world going on.

Alternatively if you just want the wreath, place it centrally in the frame and be prepared to replace the background, which is a bigger job! But a lower viewpoint would still give a better basis for that.
Moira

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paulbroad
paulbroad  681 forum posts United Kingdom840 Constructive Critique Points
16 Nov 2013 - 3:57 PM

Nothing to add. Youneed to think composition. You have a perfectly good record image but a messy background. I'm sure you could have adjusted the viewpoint a bit togive a less cluttered background.

Paul

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