Back Modifications (0)
Views: 81 (34 Unique)  Award Shortlist   

Childhood

By b_chat
Some children playing with sand at a construction site.
Adjusted the brightness and contrast levels, added vignette.
want to know about the composition...

Tags: General Black and white Portraits and people

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This photo is here for critique. Please only comment constructively and with suggestions on how to improve it.

Comments


devlin 6 652 39 India
23 Feb 2013 9:15AM
iam a little unsure if this works com positionally for me....while it creates curiosity on what the kids are focusing on in that little group i feel the lack of any of their faces / expressions in the shot take away some of the impact, again this is purely subjective and others might see it differently Smile i would probably have worked to get a angle where i could capture the story of them playing in the sand box and also capture the expressions while they do it. lastly on the shot itself it has a soft feel to it overall not sure if thats due to an upload thingy or if the original was like that.....

Cheers and hope this helps

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Jestertheclown 7 7.3k 249 England
23 Feb 2013 2:16PM
The image is quite soft and there's a high degree of contrast which, I think, appears a little exaggerated by the vignette.
It would have been nice to seen one or two of their faces too. Perhaps you could have called out to them. That usually turns up a couple of surprised, completely natural, expressions.
The composition as it is doesn't bother me, although it might have been improved if you'd got down to their level.
Also the boy to the right has had his foot cropped off.

Hope this helps.

Bren.
mrswoolybill Plus
9 949 1479 United Kingdom
23 Feb 2013 3:51PM
It's attractive but I agree that it doesn't really tell us as much as the opportunity offered.
This is the sort of subject that needs time, patience, observation. Children take their pleasures so wonderfully seriously, these are totally involved in what they are doing. They'll hang around a while, and if you are discreet it is most unlikely that they will find you more interesting than the sand! So be patient, watch them, look out for raised faces, animated expressions. Wander round the perimeter - I suspect that from the top right you would have got much more useful light on the two girls' faces.
Also - stand back a bit further, don't cramp them, allow them space. A hint of dark vignette can add a sense of intimacy, privacy, but it doesn't work for me if it intrudes into the main interest of the image, as it does here.
Moira
mrswoolybill Plus
9 949 1479 United Kingdom
23 Feb 2013 7:48PM
Just one more thing, having seen Bren's comment:

Quote:It would have been nice to seen one or two of their faces too. Perhaps you could have called out to them. That usually turns up a couple of surprised, completely natural, expressions.

That can work, but remember that you'll probably only get one chance! Once they've rumbled you they'll be keeping an eye on you. So save that for last.
paulbroad 9 114 1048 United Kingdom
23 Feb 2013 8:17PM
Some dark shadows that would benefit from the dodge tool, but the problem is a lack of faces. We have one side view and a part frontal, but not enough to pull the image together. A good tight crop, which was required, but probably get down to there level and see more faces.

Paul

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