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Why did the cow

By simont  
Why did the cow wear a bell around her neck?
Because her horn didn't work

My cow refuses to give milk, and you know why, of course.
She's been grazing in the field too long,...
And now she thinks she's a horse.

What kind of milk comes from a forgetful cow?
Milk of Amnesia

Have you ever heard the term "When Pigs Fly!"......
Well what if it were "When Cows Fly!"

Where do cows go when they want a night out?
To the moo-vies!

What was the bull doing in the pasture with his eyes closed?
Bull-dozin'

Do you know why the cow jumped over the moon?
The farmer had cold hands.

What did the bored cow say when she got up in the morning?
"It's just an udder day"

Why don't cows have any money?
Because farmers milk them dry

Where do Russians get their milk?
From Mos-cows

What's a cow's favourite moosical note?
Beef-flat

What do cows wear in Hawaii?
Moo- moos

What do call a cow that has just had a calf?
Decalfenated


Ok I'm sorry!
Simon

Tags: Cow Bovine Wildlife and nature

Voters: stevieb, deltafour, UserRemoved and 6 more


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Comments


13 Sep 2004 9:33AM
I've lost my train of thought, reading all these one liners, you could Send them to R.D. they pay for them!
Ah I got it
"The lowing herd wind slowly or the lea"
Thomas Grey. No they are just lovely. Nice one. D.

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stevieb Plus
11 3.0k 2 Panama
13 Sep 2004 9:46AM
Simon.....get out more Smile

Nice one, Cows are good.
User_Removed 11 386 2 United Kingdom
13 Sep 2004 9:48AM
Great picture, very good jokes, lol.
Why apologise? if your mad, your mad, you can't help it! lol. Smile
Keep it up, a little mad is good, nice one.
Lucien.
UserRemoved 11 53
13 Sep 2004 9:48AM
Simon !!!..you are impossible!.....but made me laugh....thankyou....Lizzie
UserRemoved 11 53
13 Sep 2004 9:48AM
oh...and l love the photo...well done---Lizzie
itinerario 12 42 Netherlands
13 Sep 2004 10:55AM
The cows are nice and the jokes are even better.
deltafour 11 13
13 Sep 2004 11:30AM
lol at the jokes,makes what is a good shot all the more appealing,click
Stewart.
maverick04 11 12 United Kingdom
13 Sep 2004 3:47PM
Nice shot who cleaned your shoes after, click.
Brian.
ginz04 11 281 18 United Kingdom
13 Sep 2004 5:47PM
lol good fun.
dellywelly 11 8
13 Sep 2004 8:05PM
I think the middle cow was dictating these and you were just taking notes! Good fun photograph, and the jokes just the right side of corny, big smiles and big click
Adele
14 Sep 2004 12:27PM
Your day off didn't work Simon. See the doctor next. Nice Cows

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