Back Modifications (3)
Views: 59 (32 Unique)  Award Shortlist   

Just Olives!

By Radders3107
This is for my City & Guilds course. I took this and thought black and white with selective colour will make the image interesting!

Tags: Black and white Specialist and abstract

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This photo is here for critique. Please only comment constructively and with suggestions on how to improve it.

Comments


pamelajean Plus
10 964 1824 United Kingdom
5 Aug 2009 11:26PM
Hello, Phil, and welcome to EPZ. I agree that selective colouring does usually make an image more interesting, but since there is only one green olive in this, I wonder if it would be better completely mono or completely coloured. Alternatively, a few more green olives might just do the trick. You have good detail and a nice shine on the olives, but the light was a bit strong on the very top of them, where some detail has been lost. Also, the piece of bread is out of focus at the back, which is acceptable, but there is also an area in the very front that is blurred. Maybe a different placement for the bread would produce a better result? And I also feel it should be up the other way, with the flat side to the surface. The bread is also quite light in tone. I think your choice of a plain white container was good. As to your composition, I see the bread as moving the image into the left side of the frame, and therefore feel that there should be space on that side, not on the right, and a bit more at the top as well. As the eye likes to travel from left to right, mirroring the image could also work. In my modification, I added canvas to the left and top, then cropped the right, made the blacks blacker, darkened the image, and sharpened just the front of the slice of bread. My second mod is completely mono. My third mod is a mirror image of the second one. I hope this is of some help.
Pamela.

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6 Aug 2009 11:43AM
Pamela, now you have modified it, I totally agrree with you. It needs that space to the side. You make really good comments, many thanks for taking the time you have with the image. Phil
6 Aug 2009 12:35PM
Great work.

Warm wishes, Iain.
FatBoyfocus 7 75 4 United Kingdom
6 Aug 2009 1:29PM
The bread a bit more crisp with less light might have helped for me... Not too sure to be honest... I keep staring at it lol, but can't exactly find what I would have changed... overall I think it's pretty good. Smile
Thanks both. Riaanuys I do think the bread could have bit darker just to frame off the picture a little? Thanks for taking the time to make the comments.
NEWMANP Plus
8 1.6k 574 United Kingdom
6 Aug 2009 3:01PM
the use of high key and the subtle colour popping are quite good choices, i dont normally go for colour pops but the green is quite subtle and i like the tone.
to be honest, im a bit unsure about including the bread, it adds nothing for me and is too tight into the left of frame and leaving the right side just a white space, i would have suggested a viewpoint higher to look not quite but directly vertically above, and possibly without the bread but just another one of the black olives on the background to the side of the dish, just to keep the composition cleaner and more graphic.

i like the rendering of the olives
regards,
Phil
Thanks Phil, all points are very relevant and thanks for the help on this
pamelajean Plus
10 964 1824 United Kingdom
7 Aug 2009 12:55PM
I like Phil's idea of an olive (or two) on the table, as if they had spilled out of the bowl.
Hi Pamela and Phil. I did try the olive on the table It might have been my positioning but it seemed a little bitty. You looked at one thing then the other and then the olive that had fallen. I actually deleted it! Perhaps I should have kept it and put them both on?
pamelajean Plus
10 964 1824 United Kingdom
10 Aug 2009 5:19PM
Glad you thought of it too, Phil.
I'd like to have seen it.

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