Back Modifications (8)
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Look

By Sillu
I used off flash with a diffuser..
Dont mind the water mark i will remove that.
I took this in an abounded place,


Tags: Red Golden Portraits and people

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Comments


dark_lord Plus
16 2.6k 695 England
5 Mar 2017 8:31PM
This is an attractive image and you've managed the off camera flash very well.
In fact. you can't tell flash was used as it's subtle so the diffuser was useful.
I must add that sometimes even when you can tell flash (or extra light source in general) was used the effect is not intrusive, because of positioning and use of light modifiers such as diffusers.

There are a couple of things my mod addresses.

Firstly there is a lot of redundant space at the top of the frame.
Sometimes this extra space can work well, to show a subject small in comparison to the scene, but here she's right at the edge of the frame which cuts across her so the result looks very cramped. By making her larger in the image as the result of a crop it looks much less cramped.

Secondly, there is part of a doorway visibl ebehind her head. not a major distrction but much cleaner and more pleasing without it. I've roughly cloned it out to show what it would look like, but if seen at the taking stage just moving your taking position down a few centimetres would abscure it totally.

Finally, it would be nice to see the complete hand as you've just chopped the ends of her fingers off. Either that or crop i a bit closer.
dudler Plus
17 1.3k 1699 England
5 Mar 2017 8:58PM
Keith's said most of it already.

Slightly wider would be good, to include the hand, and all of her hair (which is lovely). I'd include less space at the top of the frame.

I don't know quite what the reality is, but I like the look of a corridor facing the camera directly. A slightly lower camera position would have put it lower than your model's head, making a triangular composition. You shot standing, and (like most men photographing most women) you are taller than your model.

I also think there's scope for a little more brightness in the image - mod coming.

Nice work - and note how much kinder soft light is to your beautiful model, compared with direct sunlight.
5 Mar 2017 9:27PM
Like this, those rectangles of light along the corridor are nice and the corridor is blurred just the right amount for me - the emphasis is mainly on the model but there's enough to detail to give a sense of the place.
I've uploaded a mod, not sure if its an improvement but might give you some thoughts. Including all of her hair would have been nice - I've done some rough cloning to show you what it would look like and also cloned out the door sticking out from her head. I've cropped off the bottom as I'm not sure it adds much to the image, particularly as the hand is cut off.
I have tweaked the colour balance slightly towards blue, desaturated yellows a bit and lowered the hue of the yellows (to make them closer to orange/red). This makes the skin tones a bit more natural and simplifies the colour pallette of the image a bit.
There were also a few small levels adjustments to brighten the model and tone down the background.
banehawi Plus
16 2.3k 4163 Canada
5 Mar 2017 11:46PM
Your best by far.

I would like to see her face a little brighter, and framed as in the mod. The soft light is much more flattering than that harsh mid-day Sun.


Regards


Willie
mrswoolybill Plus
13 2.3k 2267 United Kingdom
6 Mar 2017 7:58AM
Well done. I like this a lot.

It needs the crop, and others have done that already. The cut-off hand is the problem. The portrait doesn't really need the height of a vertical 3 x 2 frame anyway, even if the hand was complete - the story is in the balance between the face and the receding passage. Everything else is unnecessary clutter.

NB The important difference between this and your earlier portrait uploads is that here the background is subdued, not bright, so it does'nt leap forward at us. It sits back as a background should do. That's something to bear in mind in future.
Moira
mrswoolybill Plus
13 2.3k 2267 United Kingdom
6 Mar 2017 8:20AM
I couldn't resist doing a mod. I've cropped tighter, this was crying out for a square crop, because of the balance between verticals and the horizontally receding background.

I reduced yellows a bit, dodged highlights in both eyes, and lightened the shadow on the face very slightly.
Robert51 11 7 106 United Kingdom
6 Mar 2017 8:33AM
Nice shot.

Robert
pablophotographer 9 1.7k 384
6 Mar 2017 8:45PM
I like Tom's Dudler's and Mrswoolybill's mods. No reason to make my own crop.
What I see here being missing is a story with suspense.
Why is the girl in this abandoned place? Is there by her own will? Does she feel comfortable or not?
You can ask your model to pose differently so you change the mood of the picture.
Details are nice and well taken care of, but do not miss the essence.
kindly,
pablophotographer

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